About a week before Thanksgiving, John got sick. Just a cough, with really no other symptoms. Except that he spent the next couple nights keeping me awake by (a) coughing, and (b) coughing ON me. Ewww.

And then, Thanksgiving night, I started to cough. Just a bit at first, and nothing severe. It was, really, one of the colds that’s only bad at night when you’re in a horizontal position and your body decides to rebel. I can live with those colds. They mean I can still function during the day, get stuff done, and then I just pop a Nyquil and go to bed. Case closed.

Until today, when the cold didn’t let go when I got up. And now I’m hunched over my desk, coughing, sniffling, and generally feeling crappy. And joy of joys, I get to go get food for lab meeting today. And then go to a basketball game tonight. And then host Journal Club for all the first and second years on Thursday night.

My plan, for world domination, is to infect everyone I come into contact with. Thus, it will begin with the Stanford campus, both undergrad and grad, and spread from there. Mwahahahaha!!

Oh, you think it can’t be done, do you?

Did I ever tell you about the time I singly handedly gave my ENTIRE THIRD GRADE CLASS the plague?

Okay, okay, it was strep throat, and it was only about 25 of the 30 kids, BUT STILL!!!

Apparently, strep throat doesn’t present with a fever for the first 24hrs or so, and the nurse at my elementary school figured if I didn’t have a fever, I wasn’t really sick, and thus couldn’t go home. I visited her 3 times, I felt so bad, but no luck. (Hopefully I infected her! Mwahahah!)

Throughout the day, I came into contact with classmates, and at lunch, felt bad enough that I’d just take a bite or two of a sandwhich, fruit, cookie, whatnot before giving it away to a classmate who wanted it. (Mwahahah!!)

Eventually the fever hit and I was out for a week or so, sick as a dog. By the time I came back, only a handful of kids in my class were still there (literally, only 3 or 4), and the school was actually thinking of shutting our class down until we were no-longer plague-ridden.

Seriously. I kid you not. All because of yours truly!

I am an index case waiting to happen.

(Geek alert: That’s the epidemiology term for the first person to get/spread the disease.)

So, lab today, undergrads tonight, grads on Thursday!

If only my body didn’t hate it when I tried to move, this would be a brilliant plan!